It’s all uphill from here

The first month at my ‘big-kid’ job was like a four-credit class.

Turns out, the career center wasn’t kidding about the intensity of on-the-job training.

Mere hours into my first day, I’d already started questioning my education. ‘What the hell had I been doing for the last four years? Didn’t I learn anything in college?’

That was just the beginning of my battle with the dreaded post-grad problems.

As someone who majored in English and journalism, the last thing I expected to do in my life was build a website. I studied James Joyce and Judith Butler, not HTML or flash players.

Guess what I spent my first month doing? Yeah, you got it, super smart readers: I built a website.

Seven months in, I’m actually (semi) well versed in HTML. I have successfully built about 900 pages; and whenever I do something right on my own, I throw a mini dance party.

Don’t get the wrong idea though – I still have days at work where I’d much rather hide in the supply closet than deal with emails or meetings.

Now the terrifying questions that plagued me during my first day at work no longer weigh so heavily on my mind. I did indeed learn something in college. I actually learned more than I realized. (There’s nothing more exciting than answering a question with knowledge from a random elective you took sophomore year.)

But no matter how great my education was, nothing prepared me for the shock of the working-world.

Initially, I regretted not double-majoring in computer science because my first month most certainly would’ve been simpler. (Blasted advisor! Why didn’t he tell me this was going to happen??)

But had I found a position as an economic reporter, I could just as easily lamented my decision not to major in econ and learn all about Keynesian theory.

Truthfully, I didn’t need that computer science degree – I just needed that first month. My employer decided to hire me without any knowledge of web design knowing I had the ability to learn the necessary skills.

But where did I learn to learn…oh, right. College.

My boss recently told me I was hired, in part, because I exhibited signs of the ability to “catch on quickly” – something highly valued in my office.

That’s something every student learns, whether they know it or not.

‘Oh, the syllabus does matter? The tests are taken directly from readings? If I come fifteen minutes before chapel hour the omelette line will be shorter?’

These hard and fast campus lessons are of the “catch on quick”-or-fail variety, and few students fail. The trick to the formidable big-kid job is to translate the omelette-rule to a new environment.

That ‘trick’ doesn’t come easy, though, and there are a few things I’d advise students to do while they’re still living in the warm, fuzzy embrace of college life.

If you have an internship where you are allowed to sit in on meetings, pay close attention. My internships in college were at smaller companies, which didn’t prepare me for the group meetings that are an everyday occurrence now.

There are few things more terrifying than the first time someone asks you for wisdom during a meeting. I vaguely remember mumbling something about the three-exclamation-point rule and dying a little inside.

Students should also take opportunities to get out of their comfort zone.

Although no one would accuse me of being shy, it’s important for everyone to feel comfortable meeting new people. The first day at work is like the first day of Kindergarten, grown up. You’ll be inundated with names and cursing yourself for not just working at Barnes and Noble, because at least they wear nametags.

Moral of the story: seniors, if you find yourself in the incredibly blessed position of marking “employed” on that grad survey, be prepared to encounter a few pitfalls in the next year, but also relish your good fortune.

You’re in for months (probably years) of insecurity and stress, but along with it incredible learning experiences and the fulfillment of doing something you love.

And this, I’ve found, is the quandary that contributes to all post-grad problems.